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Why Jennifer Aniston Movies Suck


I’m afraid I’m not a big fan of Jennifer Aniston. Apart from the ‘Rachel’ hairstyle, I’ve yet to be blown away by anything she does. I’m not even sure the hairstyle was hers or the inspiration of a Friends stylist anyway. If you fall into the category of being a Jennifer Aniston fan then perhaps you should look away now.  This won’t be pleasant. When I was in the States I learned to keep my mouth shut about what I thought of her ‘talents’ after getting a rather brusque telling-off (to put it mildly) when arranging Florida car hire. I had no idea that she engendered so much love out there. I’m still not sure if it had anything to do with the fact that in nearly every Friends scene her top was tight and she appeared to be very cold.
Jennifer Aniston is a bit of a Sandra Bullock kind of actress, a plain and simple girl-next-door who can play herself. The only difference is that Bullock is steadily leaving that behind and can actually act. In all the films I’ve had the misfortune to see Aniston in, she always gives the same performance. Always? Well not quite; a couple of films she plays against type but they are so contrived that you can’t take her seriously.
Brace yourself for my selection of worst Jennifer Aniston films ever. It’s by no means definitive, I’m sure you can add to it quite easily!
Picture Perfect (1997)
With a derivative plot and unappealing characters, Aniston continues to flail about for a non-Rachel character. She plays Kate who is conniving but it’s an unconvincing performance.

The Object of my Affection (1998)
Lovelorn, girl-next-door, Aniston has romantic intentions towards her best friend. The only downside is that he’s gay. Ho hum. If this scenario appeals to you then watch Will and Grace. At least you’ll get a laugh.
Rock Star (2001)
Whoever thought that Aniston could play a rock star’s girlfriend must have thought her name on the poster would be a draw rather than a put-off. Jennifer plays a loving girlfriend who tires of the travelling life. Don’t we all, dearie?
The Good Girl (2002)
It’s been a while since Aniston must have had to ‘work’ for a living like most people. Her portrayal of a working class girl seems more of a parody. The plot involves her not being happy with her bloke, doesn’t chat with him, just goes off and messes around with another layabout.

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Bruce Almighty (2003)
Jennifer Aniston phones in her performance in an otherwise excellent film starring Jim Carrey. To be honest I had to be reminded who played Carrey’s love interest in the film.

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Derailed (2005)
Film Journal International’s Ethan Alter summed it up nicely with the comment, ‘One of those forgettable efforts that’s neither bad enough to completely dismiss nor good enough to wholly recommend.’
Friends with Money (2006)
This is one of those bizarre films you leave the cinema wondering what the heck was it all about. Too much meandering and meaningful glances and wistful looks eventually just stops. I would say ‘conclusion’ but there just wasn’t one. And is Aniston really believable as someone who isn’t used to male attention? Please. Not even the maid costume sequence is enough to make me watch it again.
The Break-Up (2008)
It’s a film of two halves; the first is a comedy with few laughs and the second half seems to be a drama but with no character or conviction. Vince Vaughn plays an obnoxious boyfriend with no redeeming qualities while Aniston pines and whines about her life and everything.
Love Happens (2009)
The best thing about this film is the stellar performance and 100% credibility exuded by the cockatoo. I only watched till the point where Aniston thinks it’s a great idea to release this poor tame bird that is used to a tropical climate with regular helpings of food out into the wet and chilly climate of the north west of America where it won’t know how to forage for itself.

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And finally…
The Bounty Hunter (2010)
It’s just ridiculous isn’t it; Jennifer’s ex-husband plays an in-debt bounty hunter, Aniston commits a minor crime and gets tracked down for the bounty. The pair fall in love again. Blah blah blah.

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Guest blogger, Greg Coltman, reviews films, DVDs and music and is one of those rare guys who does enjoy foreign language films and romcoms (well, some romcoms).

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